According to lore from under the sea, dolphins are smart as hell and very, very social while turtles prefer to navigate the water in solitude, slowly and steadily. The recognition of its rareness, the pursuit of something more. In the spirit of investigating what actually works (no, really!It’s a different mentality, a philosophical fork, but for whatever reason, when the relationship is stricken (my ear can attest! ) when it comes to making, and keeping, friends as an adult, I asked the Man Repeller community (you? ) made their most recent, genuine adult friends and what takeaways were gleaned to inform subsequent friendship endeavors.My mother is almost 70 and made some of her closest friends in the last 10 years, so I know it can happen at all stages of life.My fiancé really struggles to make new guy friends as he feels lame getting in touch with someone on a weekly basis.I‘ve read enough think pieces and essays about making friends as an adult to recognize that any friendship forged amidst the hurdles of work, physical distance, dating, social anxiety, and preconceived notions is—to some extent—unlikely.I also know that it’s this precise element of rareness that makes them so worthy of the pursuit.Initiating the first out-of-gym hang was scary, but I could tell we were all edging around the idea.
What efforts did you put in to help the friendship take root?
How did you make your most recent genuine adult friend? I went alone and didn’t know anyone and I ended up meeting her and hitting it off.
This past weekend she was the maid of honor in my wedding!
Also, it’s an automatic friend “group” as opposed to just one friend. What did this experience teach you about making friends as an adult?
It’s definitely a strange breed of relationship, and feels very different from high school/college/law school friends.